I read an interview from you in college that stuck with me forever. Sorry if it is painful to revisit but you were discussing suicidal struggles. I think you mentioned some crazy statistic where cancer survivors who also experienced this said they'd rather go through cancer again. Maybe something like that. But you also described fighting for your life after being in such a low place that really inspired me in my own similar struggles. I think I tried to shout this out to you in passing when you were touring in town but it came out like "hey thanks for everything I'm bipolar too!!!" while you were already surrounded by fans haha
Not painful at all as I cannot even fathom what it would feel like to be suicidal—I have truly not had a single thought in many, many years. It is absolutely 100% true. With bipolar disorder and certain types of depression but really bipolar I disorder, I can tell you that when I was episodic, that pain was so physically severe I needed to do trauma therapy in a sense just to relieve myself of the horror of knowing where I’d been. But it’d turn out that I usually have absolutely no memory whatsoever of the depressive episodes. It is very hard to discuss this stuff publicly especially as it’s still evolving and it is a science but really far more of an art informed by science. Each person is very different.
Also laughing because that’s pretty amazing. Bark it, baby—we be out here!
Woww wow wow! I wish I could report the same. But hearing of your triumph over it... and directly from you... I can't tell you what that did for me. Thank you for offering hope and sharing your gifts. The pain is physical, head to toe. It metastasizes into endless other small sicknesses of the body not serious enough to evoke sympathy from others but severe and persistent enough to exacerbate the already poor mental. I'd be so interested in hearing more about how you were able to battle all that and arrive at such a great place. Always fascinated by other talented "sickos" who conquer at life. Lol meant with no offense at all (please) I always wonder with intense curiosity how they got there against all odds. I haven't had a chance to check out the rest of your posts up here but am excited to! We made each other's day!
Sheer luck—and I have to tell you, sharing how lucky I’ve gotten seems to elicit in many people (who deal with their own sets of issues and perhaps haven’t been as lucky as I have) a reaction completely unlike yours. Honestly, age and experience really helps, as well as having a focus outside of your own wellness, or important reasons (family, friends, etc) to remain as accountable as possible. Truth is, we aren’t treated like real people once we become public about it, and I’m not entirely certain that will change. Hasn’t made me angrier, but it has made me think of how so many other people in this world (the majority) have it far worse.
Best piece of advice I give now is one that I try to practice on a daily basis: help someone expecting nothing in return (not to your detriment or to escape your own needs) the next really bad day you have (but can manage to at least push yourself to do something)
Took me a long time to finally take my grandmother’s advice seriously. It’s changed my life.
The first part made me laugh out loud not sure why it was just refreshingly real. I can see how it wouldn't always be well received but I find it beautiful and understand other's successes as relative to my own. Love your advice! You are preaching to the choir. Not in a bad way! I just wholeheartedly agree. Maybe to a fault after reading your reminder (not let it be a detriment to me or to escape my needs). I'm thankfully 100% unmaterialistic and not wanting for things I can't have. Just heavy from the collective suffering I share in. And you're right it helps me to help others when possible and a heavier more meaningful dose of happy chemicals that other "self care" consumption methods.
more!
https://youtu.be/XVtSuw0kTvI?si=KSdHQ8SM60uypfg2
I read an interview from you in college that stuck with me forever. Sorry if it is painful to revisit but you were discussing suicidal struggles. I think you mentioned some crazy statistic where cancer survivors who also experienced this said they'd rather go through cancer again. Maybe something like that. But you also described fighting for your life after being in such a low place that really inspired me in my own similar struggles. I think I tried to shout this out to you in passing when you were touring in town but it came out like "hey thanks for everything I'm bipolar too!!!" while you were already surrounded by fans haha
Not painful at all as I cannot even fathom what it would feel like to be suicidal—I have truly not had a single thought in many, many years. It is absolutely 100% true. With bipolar disorder and certain types of depression but really bipolar I disorder, I can tell you that when I was episodic, that pain was so physically severe I needed to do trauma therapy in a sense just to relieve myself of the horror of knowing where I’d been. But it’d turn out that I usually have absolutely no memory whatsoever of the depressive episodes. It is very hard to discuss this stuff publicly especially as it’s still evolving and it is a science but really far more of an art informed by science. Each person is very different.
Also laughing because that’s pretty amazing. Bark it, baby—we be out here!
Thanks for the note. Made my day.
Woww wow wow! I wish I could report the same. But hearing of your triumph over it... and directly from you... I can't tell you what that did for me. Thank you for offering hope and sharing your gifts. The pain is physical, head to toe. It metastasizes into endless other small sicknesses of the body not serious enough to evoke sympathy from others but severe and persistent enough to exacerbate the already poor mental. I'd be so interested in hearing more about how you were able to battle all that and arrive at such a great place. Always fascinated by other talented "sickos" who conquer at life. Lol meant with no offense at all (please) I always wonder with intense curiosity how they got there against all odds. I haven't had a chance to check out the rest of your posts up here but am excited to! We made each other's day!
Sheer luck—and I have to tell you, sharing how lucky I’ve gotten seems to elicit in many people (who deal with their own sets of issues and perhaps haven’t been as lucky as I have) a reaction completely unlike yours. Honestly, age and experience really helps, as well as having a focus outside of your own wellness, or important reasons (family, friends, etc) to remain as accountable as possible. Truth is, we aren’t treated like real people once we become public about it, and I’m not entirely certain that will change. Hasn’t made me angrier, but it has made me think of how so many other people in this world (the majority) have it far worse.
Best piece of advice I give now is one that I try to practice on a daily basis: help someone expecting nothing in return (not to your detriment or to escape your own needs) the next really bad day you have (but can manage to at least push yourself to do something)
Took me a long time to finally take my grandmother’s advice seriously. It’s changed my life.
The first part made me laugh out loud not sure why it was just refreshingly real. I can see how it wouldn't always be well received but I find it beautiful and understand other's successes as relative to my own. Love your advice! You are preaching to the choir. Not in a bad way! I just wholeheartedly agree. Maybe to a fault after reading your reminder (not let it be a detriment to me or to escape my needs). I'm thankfully 100% unmaterialistic and not wanting for things I can't have. Just heavy from the collective suffering I share in. And you're right it helps me to help others when possible and a heavier more meaningful dose of happy chemicals that other "self care" consumption methods.
perfect response (laughter)
i am absolutely materialistic to a degree. I think? idk
boom. get it!